Tricks for effective communication

They say language is wired in your brain so tightly that you can change your behaviour by simply changing the way you think and speak. It's a field called Neuro-Linguistic Programming and it means exactly what it sounds like. Whoever knows the fundamentals of this subject could be able to sell you any of their ideas and you would agree with them without you even realising it. It's like they know your weaknesses and what words to use to strike. Doesn't Neuro-Linguistic Programming sound dangerous and fascinating at the same time? Well, it's your lucky day because I am going to let you in on a few of their 'tricks'.

neuro linguistic programming

One of said ‘tricks’ is to think how great it will be when you reach your goal, instead of worry about 'what if' you will never make it. For the same principle people should not focus on what could go wrong, rather on how to do it right. And number one rule: never say 'but', always use 'and'. Although rhetoric has been around too long for them to completely ignore the subtle use of 'but' in a sentence. So feel free to use it to highlight positive aspects after negative ones, as the evergreen 'I would never wear it, but you look great in it!' shows.

The logic behind this last trick of effective communication is that perspective is only given by two different points of view and during an exchange of opinions, even contrasting ones, the most effective communication happens when both points are acknowledged and kept into consideration. However, life is much, much different. People do say some extremely silly things and, sometimes, I cannot resist the urge to 'but' them.

This reminds me of the reason I didn’t want to participate in last year’s office Secret Santa (or Kris Kringle); my motivation was to avoid any more clutter in my room, when a wise friend kindly reminded me that Christmas is all about giving, not receiving. So every time I feel like saying ‘but my idea is better’ I snap my fingers: not with that attitude!

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